I woke up yesterday with stomach acid burning in my throat. This happens once in a while - usually it's stress-related. (I had lots of tests done for it... they even put a camera in my stomach after they pumped me up with Valium. another story, though.) I wasn't feeling that great, and I thought I was probably getting a cold. I ate some Cheerios, took my vitamins, drank some extra-pulp orange juice and bussed it to school. Happy that I only have one class on Fridays. I slept most of the way. During the break in my Chinese class, I went and got some lemon tea (still thinking I was getting a cold) and a muffin.

When class was over, I decided I probably needed more sleep, so I decided to go to the UBC swimming pool. Upstairs there are carpeted bleachers, and it's really warm, and lots of people take naps there. It was pretty busy, but I managed to find a place to settle down. I slept for about an hour and a half. My leg was feeling numb, so I rolled over onto my other side and suddenly felt like I'd just eaten a bunch of rocks and now they were trying to get through my pyloric sphincter. So I laid on my back for a while and stared at the wood panelling along the ceiling. I tried counting the rows of wood, but this just made me more queasy. I watched a speaker hanging from the ceiling sway ever so slightly back and forth, and I noticed that there were speakers all over the ceiling, all swinging back and forth. None of this made any contribution to making me feel better. I sat up. Whoa. That wasn't good, either. I decided I should find a pay phone and call work and tell them I couldn't come in. My legs weren't working too well, and I sort of stumbled over to a pay phone which was, luckily, not too far away. The girl who answered the phone at work didn't sound too impressed that I suddenly felt sick 5 hours before having to work yet another Friday night. I felt bad and wanted to come in, but decided I shouldn't. She said to call back in about an hour. Then I called my mom, to see if someone could come and pick me up, but my dad was out, and she had to go to work. Try to take the bus home, she said. Bring a plastic bag in case you have to throw up.

Okay. I tried walking and ended up about 20 feet away from the phone, which was also next to the bathroom. I sat on a bench, but that seemed too high off the ground, so I sat beside the bench on the floor. The panelling on the ceiling was lined up with the tiles on the floor, and every time I looked up, it seemed that the floor was moving. I thought to myself, Now, I could go to that bathroom there, but, oh dammit, that girl just went in there. I didn't want to go in there and kneel on the floor and puke my guts out if there were people in there. I tried to keep track of who was going in and who was coming out, but it seemed to me after a while that they must have been having some sort of Bathroom Party, because there were a hell of a lot more people going in than coming out. To make matters worse, I was feeling more and more nauseous. I looked over at a garbage can that was about 5 feet away from me. Oh well, I thought. If worse comes to worse. I sat there, legs spread out in front of me, trying to wait for the sickness to pass. I sat there for about 25 minutes. I knew I couldn't keep this up, though. I'm absolutely terrified of vomiting. I couldn't stand to know that I was going to have to do it in public. Suddenly, I knew it was coming, and I hurried to the garbage can. A janitor was standing there with a new garbage bag, just about to change it, but I waved him away. Dry heave. Fuck, I thought. I'm a fucking idiot. It was a false alarm. I started to go and sit down again, and then hurried to the garbage can and puked six times. Basically everything that was in my stomach went into that garbage can. It tasted like lemon tea and UBC Rise'n'Shine muffins. Not too bad. When the fun was basically over, a girl that had been sitting nearby came and asked if I wanted anything. She went and bought me a bottle of water. I thanked her and thanked her, and went into the bathroom and washed my hands and face. Feeling 100 times better. Oh well, that's over, I thought. Drank some water. Went back to the girl and gave her some money for the water.

I walked out into the cold air, drinking water. It had been snowing all day, but luckily, not sticking. It was fucking cold, though. I sat and waited for the bus. I was on it for about 7 minutes (however long it takes to get to Alma) when suddenly I knew I'd have to get off again. I was sitting against the window, so I made like I was going to get up, so the woman next to me got up so I could get off. The bus hadn't got to the stop yet, so I wasn't about to get up, and she said, "Okay," and sat down again. I managed to choke out something like, "I'm gonna be sick," and she said, "Oh," and I stumbled off, about three feet out the bus doors, collapsed onto the pavement and puked up all the water and the remaining raisins that were in the muffin in front of a second-hand clothing store. The knees of my jeans began to soak up water, and I pushed my backpack out of the way, before the puke ran all over it, and a woman came up to me, and asked if she could help. I told her I had water, and that I was trying to get home to Coquitlam, which was about an hour and half away on the bus. She suggested that I get some Gravol at Sev, which just happened to be a couple doors down. I would thank the Maker for Sev at this moment if they happened to carry Gravol, but they didn't. Neither did a nearby gas station. So I walked five blocks to the nearest drug store.

Shoppers Drug Mart in Kitsilano. Kits is basically the ritziest part of Vancouver. We're talking Yuppie Fucking Central. We've got your Capers (natural/organic food store - $$$), Coast Mountain (hiking store), 265 coffee shops, DKNY, Safeways that sell 37 different kinds of tofu/fake meat (I used to work at one), any kind of yuppie store you can imagine will be in Kits. There I was, stumbling down the street to the drugstore, which was nauseatingly well-lit. I looked up at the signs in the aisles, trying to find Gravol. Tilting my head upward only made it worse. It wasn't in the Stomach Remedies section. I didn't need Tums. I needed a fucking tranquilizer. I finally went up counter, and it was sitting right there. An over-the-counter drug. I leaned on the counter with my elbows, my head in my hands, as the lady rang it in. "Will that be all for you?" the pharmacist asked. "Yes," I said in an unintentionally raspy, punkrock voice. "I'm just trying to make it home." I felt tough and messed up. Like Billy Sacrifice or Iggy Pop or something. "Oh dear," she said. She made sure not to touch me when she gave me my change. I sat down on one of those back-comfort chairs they have at the drug store for old people who are waiting for their medicine. I took a Gravol with a couple mouthfuls of water and decided to sit there for 20 minutes and wait for it to kick in. The man sitting next to me was picking up medication for HIV. I heard him talking to the pharmacist. That was pretty interesting. I guess it could be worse, I thought. Meanwhile, the Gravol was refusing to kick in. I decided after 20 minutes to leave anyway, because there wasn't much more they could do for me there. I walked out of the store, feeling quite nauseous again, trying to tell my stomach that the drugs inside it were good, good, but it refused to listen to me. I sat down on a wet bus bench, and then looked over and saw some more comfortable undercover chairs outside of Blenz, this coffee shop. It had one of those windows where there's a kind of narrow table with barstools lined up against it, so you can sit and drink your coffee and watch people walk by. I laid my head on the table and tried to breathe. It was no use. I got up and puked all over the sidewalk in front of Blenz. Any previous remnant of anything that had been in my stomach was now on the sidewalk. A woman that was sitting outside said, "There's a bathroom inside-" and I puked again. A couple of raisins from the muffin, but mostly just water and dissolved Gravol. My mouth tasted like Gravol. One of the guys who was sitting in the window, watching the whole thing, gave me a huge stack of napkins and told me I probably had that flu that was going around. It hit you really suddenly, he said. He'd been bedridden for two days. The woman told me there was a medical clinic just a few blocks down. I thanked her. Didn't drink any water this time, and trudged my way through the cold windy streets to Khastalano (the traditional native spelling of Kistilano) Medical Clinic.

The clinic was three blocks away. They let me page my dad, who was there in about 40 minutes to bring me home. I sat on the floor in the waiting room (chairs were still too high of an elevation), surrounded by MacLean's magazines, and listening to Soft Rock Hits of the 80's. I was in my own personal hell. After a while, most of the patients were gone, and the doctor had a look at me. She suggested that, since I couldn't take Gravol orally, I take suppositiories. Woohoo. And that I drink flat gingerale and chicken broth. By the time she was done, my dad was there.

We drove home in rush hour traffic, yelling at each other about politics. My dad votes for the Canadian Alliance Party and listens incessantly to CKNW. (my mom calls it Old Fart Radio.) Needless to say, he thinks communism is about the worst thing imaginable, so he never ceases to get on my case about it. Even when I'm sick. So that was a good 40 minutes home in the car. To his credit, he went to the drugstore and bought some suppositories for me (I'm sure he was mortified) and we came home. Everything that was in my bowels was quickly ejected and a suppository was inserted. I don't know if you've ever used one of those things before, but they're fucking horrible. Ugh. I'll try not to be graphic about those. I passed out on the couch for three hours until Larissa came over and we watched TV. I was so hungry but I knew I couldn't eat anything. Finally, we were watching That 70's Show and they were eating orange popsicles, and I decided I could probably eat those, so we went to Sev and I bought two orange popsicles and ginger ale. Made some jello when I got home and went to sleep for 11 hours.